Monday, December 24, 2012
More about the things we do
So, I've thought more about the things we do. My great-grandpa Cox used to say, "Happy is the man who loves to do what he has to do." We are not in this life for drudgery. Even the simplest of tasks can be a joyous occasion if we accomplish it with the right frame of mind. Doing dishes can be tedious, repetitive, and mind-numbing or it can be a labor of love, a time for reflection, and time of renewal. The way we feel, think, and then act will in large part determine whether we enjoy the things we do.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
"Why do we do the things we do?"
Les Jones, a well known professor of psychology at Southern Utah University, is well known for his question/statement, "Why do we do the things we do?" His response is then to teach his students about FAT- feelings, actions, and thoughts. This then, is the conglomeration that leads to the actualization of actions in our lives. Perhaps actions is the wrong word, action implies some intent to act, while our behavior, and those things we just do or don't do, are not always guided by an intent to act.
Many of the great and wise men in the world have attempted to express the impact of our thoughts in our lives. James Allen, in possibly one of my absolute favorite books "As a Man Thinketh" teaches this with such simplistic clarity that it seems implausible that one would not understand this premise, our thoughts do impact and influence our lives. Some of us have the wrong idea about what a thought is and what thinking is. The simple turning over of mundane information in our minds, is not thinking. I was told as a college student that most students have never actually had a real thought. We regurgitate and we imitate and we perhaps venture into connecting ideas, but actual thinking?, not so much.
The thoughts that have the greatest impact on our actions are perhaps thoughts we aren't even aware of. Some may scoff at the idea of subconscious thoughts impacting their everyday behavior and responses, but can they actually deny that the same might be true? Then, in conjunction with our thoughts are our feelings and our actions that must be considered to fully comprehend our behavior and the way we live.
I have come to the conclusion that our lives are a spider's web. Any slight disturbance or contact with part of the web must, in even some small way, impact the remainder of the web. In this way, all aspects of ourselves are effected with any occurrence in our lives. This may lead to an almost "which came first, the chicken or the egg" discussion when it comes to discussing why we do the things we do. Do we smile because we feel good, or do we feel good because we are smiling? Sometimes, the sequence of events can be unraveled, but other times it is not so clearly understood.
The idea of FAT- feelings, actions, and thoughts makes it sound simplistic to understand why we do the things we do. However, it is not altogether that easy. For instance, depression. When one has experiences with depression, as I have, it is not enough at the time to say, this is in relation to my feelings, actions, and thoughts and that by changing them, I will get better, I will feel better, I will be able to enjoy my life again. There is a place for changing our thought cycle, by recognizing and not condoning negative self-talk, to practice positive self-visualization, but it just may not be enough. So, the religious person holds up the faith card, saying, but if you have enough faith, you can do all things. I have often wondered how these pieces fit together. Each of our lives is a different puzzle and each puzzle has different pieces that fit together differently.
You have your issues, I have mine. To try saying it isn't so would be like saying a Zebra has brown and orange stripes, and that whales swim in the sky. It is just a matter of due course that we all have our own issues. How we deal with our issues is a combination of our feelings, actions, and thoughts. However we may look at it, that is what we boil down to, our FAT. And, while some people will hate this, only you can deal with your FAT, no one else will have an ultimate impact but yourself. So, lets accept our own FAT and deal with it on our terms and leave the responsibility up to each individual to do with their FAT as they see fit.
Many of the great and wise men in the world have attempted to express the impact of our thoughts in our lives. James Allen, in possibly one of my absolute favorite books "As a Man Thinketh" teaches this with such simplistic clarity that it seems implausible that one would not understand this premise, our thoughts do impact and influence our lives. Some of us have the wrong idea about what a thought is and what thinking is. The simple turning over of mundane information in our minds, is not thinking. I was told as a college student that most students have never actually had a real thought. We regurgitate and we imitate and we perhaps venture into connecting ideas, but actual thinking?, not so much.
The thoughts that have the greatest impact on our actions are perhaps thoughts we aren't even aware of. Some may scoff at the idea of subconscious thoughts impacting their everyday behavior and responses, but can they actually deny that the same might be true? Then, in conjunction with our thoughts are our feelings and our actions that must be considered to fully comprehend our behavior and the way we live.
I have come to the conclusion that our lives are a spider's web. Any slight disturbance or contact with part of the web must, in even some small way, impact the remainder of the web. In this way, all aspects of ourselves are effected with any occurrence in our lives. This may lead to an almost "which came first, the chicken or the egg" discussion when it comes to discussing why we do the things we do. Do we smile because we feel good, or do we feel good because we are smiling? Sometimes, the sequence of events can be unraveled, but other times it is not so clearly understood.
The idea of FAT- feelings, actions, and thoughts makes it sound simplistic to understand why we do the things we do. However, it is not altogether that easy. For instance, depression. When one has experiences with depression, as I have, it is not enough at the time to say, this is in relation to my feelings, actions, and thoughts and that by changing them, I will get better, I will feel better, I will be able to enjoy my life again. There is a place for changing our thought cycle, by recognizing and not condoning negative self-talk, to practice positive self-visualization, but it just may not be enough. So, the religious person holds up the faith card, saying, but if you have enough faith, you can do all things. I have often wondered how these pieces fit together. Each of our lives is a different puzzle and each puzzle has different pieces that fit together differently.
You have your issues, I have mine. To try saying it isn't so would be like saying a Zebra has brown and orange stripes, and that whales swim in the sky. It is just a matter of due course that we all have our own issues. How we deal with our issues is a combination of our feelings, actions, and thoughts. However we may look at it, that is what we boil down to, our FAT. And, while some people will hate this, only you can deal with your FAT, no one else will have an ultimate impact but yourself. So, lets accept our own FAT and deal with it on our terms and leave the responsibility up to each individual to do with their FAT as they see fit.
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